Last time, we covered how this is all going to work, so make sure you’ve got your supplies ready, including your relaxed and happy mind!  This time, we’re going to go through an exercise to help you identify what is meaningful to you and what you spend your time on (spoiler alert - those may not be the same things!).  By the way, this exercise is inspired by Sean Achor (one of our favorite authors) who describes this technique in his book, Before Happiness.

We’ll start off re-visiting 4th grade math:

Let’s set the stage for the upcoming 3 months. This is important because it gives you an overarching context for your goals and actions. This step will call on those line graph skills you mastered in 4th grade (thank you, Mrs. Harris). Before you start declaring your Big Goals, let’s start with an assessment of your current happiness and meaning portfolio.

First, you’re going to create a graph with happiness on one axis and time on the other, like the example below. To make your graph, draw a line indicating the peaks and valleys of your happiness through time and label those highs and lows with events that coincided with your happiness levels like this example:

A blank graph for you if you don’t feel like drawing your own:

Not too hard, right? Still got it. Now, take a step back and look at your drawing and the labels on your graph. Are they ALL about work? Are none of them about work? Very interesting indeed, Future Goal Master. There’s a high likelihood the peaks and troughs on your graph have significant meaning to you. If there is something that is important to you, but doesn't show up on your map, are you making enough time for that thing?

Just like it’s important to diversify your diet or your finances, it’s important to diversify your meaning portfolio. If all of your energy is spent on your career and you have a bad day at work (and who doesn’t?), you’re likely to feel really miserable all day and maybe even the next day. If, however, you also find meaning in your after-work kickball league, the day won’t seem quite so miserable after you’ve kicked the crap out of the ball with your friends.

Have you ever sat on a 3-legged stool?

We see our personal, professional and community lives as those legs. If one leg breaks, falls off or starts to rot, the stool just isn’t stable anymore. Your personal life includes your interests, hobbies, personal finance, relationships and how you behave. Your professional arena includes your current career, future career, and skills. Things such as your neighborhood, organizations you belong to (now or in the future), network, schools/universities, and religious or spiritual groups are a part of your community.

And don’t skimp on goals that strengthen your social connections! Remember social support is the road to happiness!

Science Alert! According to a recent study by sociologists at Duke University and the University of Arizona, Americans’ circle of close friends and confidants has shrunk dramatically over the past two decades, and the number who say they have no one outside of their immediate family to discuss important matters with has more than doubled, reaching 53.4% — up 17% since the dawn of the Internet and social media. Nearly a quarter of those surveyed say they have no close friends or confidantes at all — a 14% increase since we all became so digitally connected)

Take stock of your meaning portfolio. Now we’ll do a quick pulse check to see where you are right now. Fill in the below bubbles on how satisfied you are in your personal, professional and community life:

Phew, that was hard work.  You feeling ok?  Need a snack?  When we are learning new things or processing information in a new way, our brains (which are already glucose hogs) burn even more calories, so it really might be time for a snack.

Be proud of the honest work you’ve done to take stock of where you are now.  This information will be super valuable for the next exercise, which is setting your Big Goals!